Wednesday, June 16, 2010

of making decisions and LEAVING SG LONG!!! =(


this year is not a good year for me...i have undergone many problems and i am sick of it..the problems keep on coming one after the other..when i see the others with their non-problem life,i tend to get jealous and keep on thinking about my fate...when the new semester for degree starts,i thought everything will be alright but it the other way round...firstly,in order to register,i have to pay the fees..since i applied for teachers' training program,my parents decided to delay the payment of the fees which is till 11 June 2010..secondly,my name is not in the registrar..i really hate it...i was thinking...whether i had made the right choice by applying for the teachers' training program at the first place...thirdly,i couldn't join the photo taking session for my ID..it really frustated me..fourth,i couldnt log in to UTAR portal..i have to depend on my room mate and my housemate..luckily.they are nice girls..i have to rely on them to get my notes..fifth,some tutor just cant understand my situation...it is like adding injury to a wound..just imagine that..in a week with 5 days of classes,there is only 1 problem-free day which is the first day of the new semester...then,on the 2nd week,i thought i have iron things out...alas...it is not what i think it is...now that i got the teachers' training program,i am torn apart..between UTAR or teaching institute...i just cant make up my mind...both is of my preference....i have paid RM5184 as my fees to UTAR..i felt sad for the money..but then,i worry about my future..what if i cant get a job when i grad???the future disturbs me alot...if only i can predict my future....sigh....i cant sleep..i keep on thinking about this...but finally i have decided...i will leave UTAR...which is sad to me..to tell the truth,i dont like to be controlled!!! i have a free life here studying in a private institution..i will not have my freedom in a government institute!!!!i just hate it!!!!why am i landed with such dilemma???...also...some people are just good at talking...ya..talk all u can but u cant understand my situation!!!just shut up will ya??? i feel heavy to leave my new found friends.-->pek yong,e ling,kirba,chin chin,jun yinh,tam,kah ann and oso joyce,huey shan,rajiv...it really made me sad...but life is always about making choices...=(
i really hope i had made the right choice...UTAR is and will always be MY CHOICE...eventhough i am leaving this institution...=(

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